Dear Friends...

Lately, as I've been reading, it seems the things that are sticking out most to me are in regards to relationships. As previously mentioned, I'm convinced that I have the best friends and family this crazy world has to offer and when I recognize the fact that God customized my world with them in it, it knocks my argyle socks right off. In recognizing that they are gifts determined just for me from the Giver of all gifts, I cherish them all the more. However, so often I fail at telling them. This is my attempt.

When I think about moments in my life where I've felt the most loved, the saying "the people who matter most to us are those who show up in our lives" can be applied to almost every situation. Showing up can mean an array of things. By choosing to show up, however that may look, from being physically present or whispering a prayer miles away, in that moment, you're choosing someone else over yourself. You're saying, in your showing up, "hey, your worth my time." I never want to miss the opportunity to let someone know that. Dear friends, you are so worth my time.

When I think about moments in my life where I've felt the most broken, I can point to people who have been willing to show up and in their showing up, they were putting me back together. I think about the friends who knew that there was a crying me on the other end of the phone, but picked up anyway. I think about the friends who have come out to their porch after dark to give me a hug, no questions asked. I think about the friends who have just sat with me in silence instead of forcing a conversation. I think about the friends who have prayed for me and with me. I think about the friends who have been with me in awkward situations and remained themselves. Friends who tell a joke, when most wouldn't. Friends who just listen, even in my crazy, irrational rants. Friends who call me out. Friends who do not compromise in speaking truth. (Sidenote: My friends are better than yours. Hands down.) In all of those scenarios, there is a common theme. I was met with a heart that loved me and in that moment, was committed to me, "a heart full of hope for" me. Dear friends, my heart is full of hope for you.

When I think about moments in my life where the most laughter has ensued, it has been the moments where spontaneity was the most possible. Where there has been freedom to just be. When "you are free to love without an agenda". When there is expectancy without expectation.

"If you and I are friends, there is an expectancy that exists within our friendship. When we see each other or are apart, there is expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else. But what happens if I change that ‘expectancy’ to an ‘expectation’ -- spoken or unspoken? Suddenly, law has entered into our relationship. You are now expected to perform in a way that meets my expectations. Our living friendship rapidly deteriorates into a dead thing with rules and requirements. It is no longer about you and me, but about what friends are supposed to do, or responsibilities of a good friend" (The Shack)

This notion that love does not force itself has been replaying over and over in my mind. Friendship that is forced is not really friendship because the beauty of friendship is that it's a choice. You can choose whether or not someone is your friend, that's what makes it so special. You're someones friend because they choose you. Dear friends, oh how, I choose you.

When I think about those whom I love the greatest and whom have loved me the greatest, I think about those who I know the most and whom I have allowed to know me the most."So many believe that it is love that grows, but it is the knowing that grows and love simply expands to contain it. Love is just the skin of knowing" It's the people who have seen me at my worst and in those moments have never ceased to love me like I was at my best. It's the people who know that even though I might say this, I mean that. It's the people who know all of silly quirks and insecurities, but love me anyway. It's the people who know me and stay. Dear friends, I love knowing you.

Dear friends, dear friends, dear friends....